Who’s lucky?  I am, I am!!!  Last week was a duesy; strange things happened!  Interesting things; very interesting things happened.  I lost my voice last Sunday; as one Dr. phrased it, my “brain scrambled”.  Really?  I actually went to the hospital on Monday, simply because I couldn’t talk.  I could write, drive, do everything as my “normal” routines goes; basically I could live my active, FUNCTIONALLY ACTIVE  life, (except I couldn’t talk).  Clients like that; I couldn’t yell at them!  I drove to the hospital, and checked in.  I brought my files, and pointed to whatever was necessary, file-wise.    8:00 Monday morning.  I knew nothing was wrong, but I had to make sure.  So I go go into a room, and they want to run tests on me; after all, it involves my brain!  MRI, heart scan, CT scan; keep in mind, I just had my MRI in December, and everything was clean.  Everything was clean Monday, too.  Went home Tuesday, about 11:00a.m.  Still couldn’t talk, but since I wanted to go home so bad, and since everything was clean, I went home.  Yesterday I could finally talk, SLOWLY.

So why am I so lucky?  First of all, I love UCLA!  I get a private room, (I guess my private reservation still holds!), and the nurses: WOW!  I had one who was SO nice!  She came to see me 5-6 times; and since I was in the ER, (there’s no meals, there, in the ER), she was going out to lunch, and wanted to know if she brought a dinner back, would I eat it?  Even when I couldn’t talk, I could nod!  Thai food, I loved it!  She wanted to make sure I was taken care of; she wanted me to write what I couldn’t communicate.  So I was in the ER till about 9:00.  As she was about to get off work, she brought me a tray from the cafeteria; I was so happy, so happy!  I don’t know how she scored that, but she did it!  UCLA knows how to work it; no matter how how it works, it works for me.  The rest of the crew was right up there , too.  I watched TV all night, in the ER.  When I got to my room, I watched TV, and then slept soundly!

OK, time to get serious; I couldn’t talk, but that’s the only thing I couldn’t do.  I could still drive, (by the way, $18:00 on parking, OUCH!), I could work the next day, I could run with my dog the next morning; I could DO things.  The last blog I wrote, it was about a friend-in-marriage-in-law thing; she went on a vacation, and had to be helicoptered off that ship that was stuck after a fire, (2 weeks ago), was discovered she had a lemon-sized tumor (malignant) and had to be operated immediately.  I don’t feel to to bad.  You know, I just recently realized that I don’t need to be ashamed of my “disability”.  I used to hide away, then come out when I was “clean”.  No more; I am who I am.  I can’t talk fast, but f#ck it, I can still talk.  I can still work.  I have a pretty good life, even with limitations.  I’m proud of these things, very proud!  For everyone who has a “difficult” situation, keep on going out, chat with people, conserve with everyone!  Because you are you;  be proud!

We never know how the path runs; please, please, please enjoy these days!  I’m 54, and all my cousins are around, (you know who you are!) are around my age.  I still think I’m 20, but I’m not, and “oooh boy” to that!  Enjoy, enjoy, enjoy your years, months, hours, minutes.  There precious.  Oh, and I am very, very LUCKY!


  • Scott

    Harold, it’s almost like throwing a wicked curve ball; it just is what it is. We think we need to go one way, but the Man upstairs says, “no, let’s go that-a-way!” ; and you have to trust that. I do hope everything is great with you; the best of health to you and your family.

    Warm wishes,


  • Rosann

    Love being one of those cousins that you referred to. Life is a journey for certain! Just when we think that we have FIGURED IT all out, things change. I feel very blessed to be born in a very close faithful loving family! This lent season reminds me of what we have to be THANKFUL for. I hope that my last words either from my lips or from my soul will be “Thank You”

  • Scott

    Ohhh, it will be! Rosann, you are nothing less than a saint; there’s so much about you that I just ADMIRE! Just keep goin’ on; I love you!

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